The spaces she leads

Hey my show

2005-12-07T05:45:50Z

Hey here's info for the show I'm directing:

"Roscoe In The Wilderness"
By Betsy Walters
Directed by Faetra Petillo
With Graham Skipper and Taylor Steel
December 10th @ 9:30PM, December 11th & 12th @ 8PM
Gerald Quinn Black Box Studio Theatre @ Fordham University.

Call me for info 551-265-0782 reservation line won't be up till probably Thursday

andsoitgoes23 @ 2005-10-28T19:49:00

2005-10-28T23:39:44Z

:::exhale:::

That was unexpected

2005-10-20T03:55:57Z

So, this entry is going to be about playwriting. For the first time in playwriting with Matthew, I was confronted with structural problems. Not writing problems, there are always plenty of those, but genuine "I don't think this scene serves the purpose of what I asked" problems. It floored me. I was also confused with the placement of the scene I wrote within my play, but I had no idea how confusing the actual scene could be. I knew writing a very long play would prove as a challenge in playwriting class, but I thought the challenge was going to come once it came time to edit, not during the actual presentation of my teachers basic beginning, turning point, and ending scenes. I was definitly inspired in class. I needed major re-writes, and I needed them soon. Luckily, the kid I babysit has strep throat. (not that I'm at all finding joy in that...poor kid), but directly after playwriting when I was working I had free time while he was in a very long childrens tylenol induced sleep and I was able to get a lot of my problems and ideas worked out on paper, and I came back to the same conclusion that I brought into class today.

Now I normally would have just been frustrated and disappointed with my own inabilities as a writer, and spent days thinking about how exactly to format my play into exactly what my teacher wanted. I edited all afternoon, and started some new stuff I was putting off, Lot of good stuff came from it, but still...I was unsettled. Like I said, normally, I would have just kept trying to mold my play. What did I do instead? I wrote my professor what started out as a few basic questions, an equivalent of a three page essay about the nature of turning point scenes. Sadly, this defense or maybe even just general intrigue is probably the best piece of writing I've done in awhile. Luckily, I really had nothing else to do tonight, or at least no immediate tasks.

So yea that was basically my entire day. My play. Even if it was just a cyclical conflict, I at least explored, and if he e-mails me back telling me I'm out of my mind and to just write a traditional turning point scene, I will mold away. At least I fought, and not in the sake of personal insecurity, but a general attempt to learn more about the craft. And so it goes.

An Update

2005-09-14T14:53:51Z

So these are the things I feel the need to share about my life right now.
A) I have fallen in love with my apartment.
B) This past weekend pretty much rocked my world, and if this is even the slightest representation of what senior year will be like, I'm super pumped.
C)What I'm not super pumped about is most of my classes. Playwriting is awsome, as is theatre history, but my other two classes I could do without. I'm working on getting some ritalin to take on Tuesdays. Kidding, I am not.
D)There's a giant dog in Esperanto right now that keeps breathing on me and its making my uncomfortable
E) I'm excited for this weekend. Andrew, possibly a Mike, maybe a party, etc...should be good times.
F) Corpse Bride, Thumbsucker, Rent, and Goblet of Fire. I'm going to cream my pants this fall.
G) I saw Dar Williams perform last night at Tower then drinks up in the 80's with Olwyn. Good times
H) As soon as my money comes in from Fordham the following will happen: Arrested Development and Lois and Clark: The New Adventures of Superman.
I) I'm becoming a big fan of itemized lists of information such as this one, as opposed to paragraph form.

I don't know I guess that's it.

School School

2005-09-07T15:26:00Z

Yesterday I had three classes. I have since dropped all three of them. This leaves a giant hole in my schedual the size of the impact of Hiroshima. I need to remedy this. I came to school early but I just got a call from Rachel and I apparantly locked her inside of the apartment. I need to go get her out of there.
Until later.

andsoitgoes23 @ 2005-08-26T16:18:00

2005-08-26T20:13:06Z

I hate painting. I hate it hate it hate.
I also hate those stupid fucking cats. I can't wait until septermber first thank god it's only a few days away or else i might throw them out the window. And watch with pleasure as they squeal and perish. Gah!

I'm in a foul mood right now. I haven't updated in quite some time so it sucks that when I do I'm in a foul mood. I'm just a little over tired, and my apartment is gross as a result of said spawn of satan (cats) and rachels soon to be moving out ex boyfriend. I'm leaving for the Jersey shore in a little while, still haven't gotten my loan shit straightened out. I'm so unprepared for real life to start.

Again I repeat...gah!

I mean of course I was gonna take it...

2005-07-29T15:06:05Z

This just disproves Heidi's beliefs that I would be placed in Hufflepuff. 78% bravery bi-atch!

11", Ash, Phoenix

You scored 31 wisdom, 44 bravery, 21 emotional, and 16 martyrdom!

An ash wand signifies growth, balance, and protection. The phoenix tail feather as your core means that you have the capability to be an extremely powerful wizard or witch and that you will defend those you love at all costs.

My test tracked 4 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender
:

You scored higher than 16%
on wisdom

You scored higher than 78%
on bravery

You scored higher than 46%
on emotional

You scored higher than 26%
on martyrdom

Link: The Harry Potter Wand Test written by sputnik845 on Ok Cupid

I have a home...

2005-07-26T23:59:25Z

Ok so remember how I was constantly saying that this is the worst summer ever...my life sux...my work sucks...my luck sucks. Well all that changed today when the gods came down and said "Here, Faetra....here is an apartment on FUCKING MACDOUGAL street for you."
And I said "Why thank you gods of luck. It's about fucking time". Yea so I have a place. I'm living with this NYU student and her boyfriend on Macdougal between West 3rd and Bleecker. Literally right across the street from Cafe Wha?! I still can't believe it. I move in next week. I owe my father my life literally and financially right now, but I have an apartment!

And now celebratory beer will commence!
Woo hoo!

andsoitgoes23 @ 2005-07-26T14:42:00

2005-07-26T19:45:30Z

I want worries to fade.
I've been having the same dream over and over again: I'm on an escalator, going up, in a really modern museum. I keep climbing up the stairs except it won't end. There's no place to get to. Then I'm transported to this bar I used to go to and I'm waiting for someone. All of my friends are there and I'm having a good time, but I keep waiting for someone to walk in the door, even though he doesn't know I'm expecting him. Then the dream ends. There are different variations to the dream, but it's all the same point really. I think this summer might be trying to kill me. I'm fighting the good fight but somethings gotta give. Or maybe I'll just go to Disney World...god only two more weeks, I can't wait.

I've been thinking a lot about Harry Potter lately. That last book really got to me. SO here are my theories (in no particular order):
DON'T READ IF YOU HAVEN'T FINISHED!!!!

1) Snape is NOT REALLY a Death Eater. I believe this for various reasons. Number one, I just don't think it is JKRs style to do something like that. If she was going to have Snape be really evil she would have placed subtle hints throughout the book, then have it be BAM at the end. She would not have it revealed to us in the second chapter. It's just too easy. Number two, there is no way, no matter how good they say Snape is a Occulemecy (spelling?) that he could have fooled Dumbledore. The thing they say about Dumbledore loosing his judgement in his old age is a load of poo. That was one sharp wizard even to his dying day (::tear:::). Dumbledore trust Snape for a very good reason beyond just mere faith in his repentence. I think JKR touched a little bit on that this book, but is saving the real reason for book eight. That being said, here are my two possible theories for Snape killing Dumbledore. The first and most obvious reason is that Dumbledore made Snape promise to do such a thing to keep up his double identity, which will be essential as Voldy gets more powerful. Neither Dumbledore or Snape knew about the invasion of the Death Eaters the night it happened. They both knew what Malfoy was planning, but neither of them knew when it was going to happen. PLUS if you read closely, you'll notice that when Dumbledore "begs for his life" (according to Harry's perspective) he never says NO. Or DON'T all he says is Severus...please... leading me to believe that he is begging Snape to follow through on his promise. AND...if you read what happens after that, Snape does not so much lay a finger on Harry OR anyone else. He attacks no one on his way to the tower, and all he does is ward off everything Harry throws at him, while he was trying to escape. If he really wanted to get away quicker (or even weaken Harry for Voldemort) he could have injured him. Instead he does nothing because he is clearly still on Harry's side, even if he is a meany. Also, he gets REALLY upset when Harry calls him a coward, that is the only thing that makes him turn around, and notice how Harry notes the expression in his face as being twisted and painful. I would get upset too if I just killed someone close to me for the sake of the man/ wizard kind and someone was telling me I was a coward. Ok so that is theory number one. Now, my theory is a little different, a little far fetched, and a little problematic as I can't fill in every detail just yet. BUT I think that Snape killing Dumbledore has something to do with the Horcrux Dumbledore and Harry found that night. I think that the locket is not the real Horcrux, but the potion was instead, Something was inside that potion, something connected to the death of R.A.B, and it stayed inside Dumbledore, and Dumbledore needed to be killed in order to destroy the Horcrux. I think Dumbledore knew this and told Snape to kill him, that's what they were arguing about before Harry and Dumbledore went. This theory probably is not true, because it just had too many holes in it, I just think it's strange how Dumbledore was begging for Snape from the moment they left the cave. Also, I think that Dumbledore could have easily disarmed Malfoy when they were alone together. I think he was waiting for Snape, biding his time before he someone got him. I don't know...I don't know...but I do think some sort of Horcrux was destroyed that night. But who knows.

2) Loved Harry and Ginny, loved Ron and Hermione. I live vicariously through their romances. I like how she left things between Harry and Ginny as well.

3) Felt sorry for Malfoy. Don't have him anymore. I think something will happen with him, either he is going to be killed or he is going to go over to the good side. Who knows.

4) I dont' know how I feel about the book in general. Obviously, I loved it, but it also left me with this odd feeling of detatchment, like everything I'd come to know about Harry Potter was being destroyed. I can't believe Dumbledore is gone. I can't believe the next book is not going to take place at Hogwarts. I can't believe they all grew up.

Jeez. That's enough NERD for now.

Independent

2005-07-26T00:23:50Z

I don't understand myself some...rather most, of the time. i don't understand why I don't like certain people. It's not hatred, it's not biterness, not seclusion, just a rather ambivalent feeling I get from people. My intentions aren't bad, they just are false expectatons. There's so little time and so much to do in life, why waste it on something other than incredible? Make the most of each moment right?

Yea so that little bit means that i never called a certain someone back. I'm waiting for the phone to dial his number and have a fantastic excuse for me as well. Until then I guess I just won't. I don't feel guilty, just a little frightened about what is going on. Have I given up on relationships all together? It might be so. It might just be a phase. Like Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes. Except I'm all alone and like it that way.

Heidi and I have decided to make tonight a wine night. Fabulous.

andsoitgoes23 @ 2005-07-20T18:17:00

2005-07-20T22:09:34Z

God...

2005-07-18T03:42:37Z

I think...that Harry Potter and The Half-Blood Prince...just ate my soul.
That's it for now. I'm too sad to write anymore. I haven't cried this much in months. I feel so drained...God these books are so damn good!

Aaaaaaah

2005-07-15T04:25:05Z

And I will call him Squishy. And he will be my Squishy.

The end.

jalepenos BLAH

2005-07-06T04:13:50Z

I am a New Yorker again. And I live with Leah Hendrick. Life is complete.

I miss Andrew because no one else was there to eat my jalepnos tonight. It's the little things in life you know...

Work tomorrow. Yea Yea Yea...
And so it goes...

Oh Indian Man...Oh Indian Man...Will I Ever Quit Smoking?

2005-07-05T15:03:33Z

So my entry is now dedicated to that random Indian man who walked past me smoking my cigarette across the street from work the other day. He turned and said, "Do you know that smoking is bad for you?". "I'm well aware" I said with that sarcastic tone in my voice. And he walked away. Just like that. At first, I was irritated. WHO DOESN'T KNOW SMOKING IS BAD FOR THEM? WELL CHRIST ON A CROSS I THOUGHT IT WAS GOOD FOR ME! I THOUGHT IT SOLVED WORLD HUNGER! Anyway, but then after a couple of drags of thinking about this odd moment in my life I decided how grateful I was of this Indian man and here my friends, is why. Who says that anymore? Really? Who bothers to tell someone that smoking is bad for them when CLEARLY they have to already know since the cigarette box clearly tells them they will die an early and painful death post purchase? This Indian man does, that is who. It was one of those movie scenes you never imagined was possible in the real world until an Indian man comes along and proves you wrong. Thank you Indian Man, wherever you are.

On another note, happy belated fourth coming from possibly the least patriotic person there is. I celebrated the fourth by wreaking havoc on the Ridgewood parade with PS in our stoner attempts to get bagels with chocolate chip cream cheese. Is creamcheese one word? No definitly not that doesn't look right... Anyway. Then I spend the rest of the day at home, ordered food with the family and watched "Angels in America". I think right now we could use some angels in America. If anyone is an angel, it is Emma Thomson. Done.

Pizza

2005-07-03T02:42:56Z

I just ate a DiGiorno mini pizza. It was quite tasty.

I hate this summer and all it stands for.

That's it for now.